Here we are, closing in on the end of the season. And the pundits, prognosticators, and predictors have made their assessments, forecasts, and evaluations. Surely we know at this point how the teams rank and who should beat who. Right?

No, and don’t call me Shirley.

Early Game – Italy vs Portugal

Game 1 featured Portugal (in first place since November) against fourth place Italy, who have been clobbered in six straight games. Should be a cakewalk for the Lisbonites. Surely.

Roman sniper Steve Davis opens the scoring but Robin Chantaj evens the score a minute later. Davis, unappreciative of Chantaj’s efforts, scores again to make it 2-1 for Italy.

And then league mascot Mike “Maybe Last Year” Rukavina — whose trophy case contains THREE Art Ross Trophies (leading scorer), two Hart Trophies (season MVP), and TWO Rocket Richard Trophies (most goals), notched his first goal in this, his 14th game of the campaign (he’s been focusing more on assists and grandchildren this year).

Scott Wilson managed to tuck one in before the period ended, but it was still these underdog Italians out front after one by a score of 3-2.

It was a fierce goaltending battle through most of the second frame, Senkowski and Cioffi glaring at eachother from opposite ends of the ice. But it was Senkowski who blinked first on a Mike Russo shot with 6 minutes to go to tie the game and start the first stream of Italian fans to head for the gates, refusing to bear witness to a 7th straight loss for their beloved Romans.

But as they turned on their car radios they found that in the few minutes they were gone the Italians attacked, two quick goals against a stunned Portuguese squad by Wodar and Napolitano to make it 5-3 going into the third period!!

More tight goaltending for the first half of period three until Portugal D-man Alex Baluta made it 5-4 and Italian fists started clenching again. Surely this wasn’t shaping up to be loss number 7 for this poor team!

No, and don’t call me Shirley. Senkowski SLAMS the door shut while the Law Firm of Fasulo, Wodar and Johnson presents Italy’s case to be an absolutely LEGIT contender in the upcoming post-season.

Final Score – Italy 8, Portugal 4. The Italians DOUBLE the first place team and foil all the ideas and assumptions of the Predictors, Pundits, and Prognosticators.

Italy’s Player of the Game is veteran D-man Dave Dupal while Dandy Don Hambly takes the honours for Team Portugal.

Late Game – Scotland vs Ireland

The late game was just as easily predictable as the early show. Scotland’s vaunted offence has made goalies pay all year, and Ireland, well they’ve been in the basement longer than grandma’s steamer trunk. They should be little match for the kilts. Surely.

Nieminen and Henderson start this thing with a good old goaltender’s battle. Absolutely no net for most of the first until Brad Stoll beat Nieminen in the waning minutes. This seemed to pop the seal though with Ireland’s Joel May getting revenge a minute later and Tim Randa adding one for the Scots before the period ended: Scotland 2, Ireland 1.

More goalie heroics in period two with only Paul Riopelle finding twine at the midway point to make it a 2-2 draw after two periods. This one was going to come down to the final period.

Todd MacDougall put Scotland ahead early in the third period and this one was starting to look like another tough loss for the leprechauns. After all, they’re in last place. Right?

Noone told Paul Riopelle, evidently. With 6 minutes left he tied the game and with two minutes left he put his Irish ahead for good.

THE IRISH WIN! Final Score: Ireland 4, Scotland 3. Ireland takes it’s winning streak to two games while the kilts swallow their fifth one-goal loss of the campaign.

Irish Player of the Game goes to Joel May who was all over the ice, while Tim Randa sang The Tears of Scotland once more in the Glaswegian changeroom.